


It All Started With a Microwave

by dysfunctionalbatfam



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU, Young Justice (Cartoon)
Genre: Alfred rules all, Duke is always scared, Fluff, Gen, Humor, Jason and Steph are the ultimate chaotic duo, No editing we die like jason todd, Social Media, Texting, Wally West Is An Idiot, group chats, texting fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-21
Updated: 2020-04-21
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:40:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23761702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dysfunctionalbatfam/pseuds/dysfunctionalbatfam
Summary: Wally makes a mistake in which he ends up in Wayne Manor and officially meets the Batkids. Hilarity ensues. Told in text messages.-wafflehouse: did y'all see wally's reaction i'm c a c k l i n g-
Relationships: Dick Grayson & Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson & Jason Todd & Tim Drake & Damian Wayne, Dick Grayson & Roy Harper & Wally West, Dick Grayson & Wally West, Duke thomas & Cassandra cain, Jason Todd & Stephanie Brown, Stephanie Brown & Cassandra Cain & Barbara Gordon
Comments: 12
Kudos: 182





	It All Started With a Microwave

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Nycis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nycis/gifts), [GraceEliz](https://archiveofourown.org/users/GraceEliz/gifts).



_**The Golden Trio - 10:51 A.M.** _

> **wallman:** ok ok ok i can explain
> 
> **dickiebird:** you better
> 
> **wallman:** so y'know the safe thingy you find in hotels, right? the stuff with like the numbered pad which you set and lock stuff in???
> 
> **dickiebird:** yes I know what a safe is, bro, get to the point
> 
> **wallman:** i remembered the safe because i wanted to keep some
> 
> **wallman:** stuff away from the cleaning lady
> 
> **dickiebird:** "stuff"
> 
> **wallman:** no go away
> 
> **wallman:** anyway, i couldn't find it in the closet area so i found the microwave
> 
> **wallman:** i swear they look the same and there's a numbered pad and
> 
> **wallman:** i put my keys, wallet, and stuff in it and i set my code???
> 
> **Roy:** There's a beep after you enter the numbers to signal that it starts cooking.
> 
> **wallman:** shhh there was free breakfast ok ok
> 
> **wallman:** i couldn't wait
> 
> **wallman:** dick i need your help
> 
> **wallman:** dick
> 
> **wallman:** dickkkk :,(
> 
> **Roy:** You literally just told him to go away, smh.
> 
> **wallman:** oh shit ur rite
> 
> **wallman:** dick i'm sorry come back pleSe
> 
> **dickiebird:** you owe me
> 
> **wallman:** THANK YOU SM

_**dickiebird + Batdad (BruceW.) - 11:01 A.M.** _

> **Batdad:** So you're telling me that Wallace blew up a hotel room and his keys, phone and wallet. Because he mistook a microwave for a safe.
> 
> **dickiebird:** I said _maybe_
> 
> **Batdad:** ...
> 
> **Batdad:** Fine. He can stay at the Manor until Barry helps him get all of this sorted out.
> 
> **dickiebird:** you're the best
> 
> **Batdad:** Make sure I don't regret this.
> 
> **dickiebird:** no promises ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

_**dickiebird + wallman - 11:12 A.M.** _

> **dickiebird:** it's done
> 
> **wallman:** yessss
> 
> **wallman:** how do i sneak it in? duffel bag or the guitar case like a hitman disguised as a homeless street musician??
> 
> **dickiebird:** hmmm
> 
> **dickiebird:** no
> 
> **dickiebird:** it's too obvious
> 
> **dickiebird:** we need something that they won't suspect. luggage trunk
> 
> **wallman:** deal.

_**dickiebird + wallman - 11:32 A.M.** _

> **dickiebird:** b said two would be good. you don't want to join us for lunch
> 
> **wallman:** you know what, i won't ask
> 
> **wallman:** thanks dude
> 
> **dickiebird:** no problem
> 
> **wallman:** love you bro <3
> 
> **dickiebird:** love you too bro <3

_**dickiebird + wallman - 3:23 P.M.** _

> **wallman:** your siblings are insane
> 
> **dickiebird:** I know, but I love them
> 
> **wallman:** i don't
> 
> **wallman:** help
> 
> **dickiebird:** where are you even? I can't see you anywhere
> 
> **wallman:** hiding
> 
> **wallman:** the short one is going to kill me
> 
> **wallman:** save me bro
> 
> **dickiebird:** I can't save you if you don't tell me where you are, dumbass
> 
> **wallman:** use your detective skills
> 
> **dickiebird:** ...
> 
> **wallman:** fine fine
> 
> **wallman:** you're spending too much time with bruce and soon you'll be going "hrm"
> 
> **wallman:** anyway, in the attic chilling out with my box homies
> 
> **wallman:** who by the way, are better friends than you'll even be
> 
> **dickiebird:** I'm not saving you
> 
> **wallman:** ok ok ok i'm stopping but i'm serious the little one is going to murder me and you'll never find my body
> 
> **wallman:** i had my funeral all planned out so i need you guys to get my body
> 
> **dickiebird:** you owe me two

_**dickiebird + Little D (DamianW.) - 3:27 P.M.** _

> **dickiebird:** what did I tell you about threatening to kill our guests?
> 
> **Little D:** I was merely challenging his honor. I have heard of his reason to stay and I already know he's an imbecile. He doesn't deserve to stay in the Wayne Manor. 
> 
> **Little D:** Where are you, Grayson?
> 
> **dickiebird:** saving his sorry butt from you
> 
> **Little D:** You do not need to censor profanities around me. His reaction has only proven me correct.
> 
> **dickiebird:** dad has allowed him to be here, relax dami
> 
> **Little D:** Fine, I will allow it for now.
> 
> **dickiebird:** thank you, love you so much little bro <3

**_B's Gray Hairs - 3:12 P.M._ **

> **wafflehouse:** did y'all see wally's reaction i'm c a c k l i n g
> 
> **BeenDeadDoneThat:** Great work, steph
> 
> **wafflehouse:** thanks dude
> 
> **dickiebird:** this is a duo we should fear
> 
> **DamianW.:** Tt. They are too weak to worry about.
> 
> **BeenDeadDoneThat:** Now you listen here you little shit  
>   
>   
>  **DamianW.:** I am not afraid of you, Tofdjskjkflghgshnkjdfklnkdd
> 
> **waffle house:** can't text i need to record this
> 
> **dickiebird:** can we get an F in chat for dami
> 
> **beanjuice:** F
> 
> **beanjuice:** Steph, you gotta send me the video later
> 
> **beanjuice:** I'll trade you
> 
> **DamianW.:** F
> 
> **DamianW.:** Got the demon spawn's phghissnfdjkghdknjfagbiwea
> 
> **beanjuice:** There we go again
> 
> **DamianW.:** Don't listen to Todd. I have bested him.
> 
> **BeenDeadDoneThat:** Fuck you alfie was there, I couldn't keep fighting
> 
> **dickiebird:** language, Jay
> 
> **wafflehouse:** that was wayyyyyyyyyyyy too entertaining
> 
> **wafflehouse:** i'll trade you tim meet me at our usual spot during patrol
> 
> **beanjuice:** Deal.
> 
> **dickiebird:** gotta go, brb
> 
> **BeenDeadDoneThat:** Won't miss you, dickhead

_**wafflehouse + Babs (Oracle) - 5:03 P.M.** _

> **Babs:** I've backed up the video for you, nice recording.
> 
> **wafflehouse:** thanks gtg make a trade w/ timmy

* * *

_**B's Gray Hairs - 9:53 A.M.** _

> **Duke:** You know what
> 
> **Duke:** I don't even want to know anymore
> 
> **casscain:** Good choice.

**Author's Note:**

> Started a few lines last year in my Notes app and threw it away. Decided to pick it back up again, so here you go.


End file.
